In this section, we read Anne-Marie Slaughter's article "Why Women Still Can't Have It All" hear from Dannae Sewell in "How to Run a Daycare Center" as well as reading about "Therese Carter" from Studs Terkel's Working.
To start with the heftiest of the three, "Why Can't Women Still Have it all" I would first like to say that although I try my hardest not to, I almost always view my world in a very traditionalist manner. I like to be dainty, I like teaching, I like little kids, I hate dirty things, my room is all pastels and there is no satisfaction better than going to get my nails done. That being said, this article really made me ponder how that starts. As a child, my mom hated pink and refused to let me wear anything saying "Girls Rule" or "Brat" or whatever hideous bedazzled outfit choices are offered at Kohl's. However, I think the fact that she always made a distinction in making me against girly clothes, made me think about it more than I would have. She claims "Men are still socialized to believe that their primary family obligation is to be the breadwinner; women, to believe that their primary family obligation is to be the caregiver." And this is completely true, men still grow up with their dads complaining about work and their mom cooking dinner and they get monster trucks and girls get baby dolls to take care of. But then you have to think, this can't all be social can it? Maybe little girls really always will want to play with the doll and the boys would always rather smash things or do whatever they do. Right now, I don't think that it is possible to have it all. It can't be. You can't sleep 7 hours a night and work 60 hour weeks as a major CEO of a company while raising two children. I think that it's going to be a very long time before men start feeling comfortable sacrificing work and women feel comfortable sacrificing a little family time. The disconnect is all about balance, but I don't think society will be in a place to accept men cutting back a bit on work and women spending a bit more time in their job to be able to work in their successful jobs while have a balanced home life.
I think it's obvious when listening to Dannae Sewell's interview that she's extremely passionate about her job. Coming from someone that used to work in a horribly run daycare center, we need more Dannae's in the world. However, as much as I love her character, she almost freaks me out a little bit. I'm an education major and I still don't think that I will ever be this passionate or emotional about my students. I love working with kids and I love teaching and helping people but I think Dannae is a rare breed.
On the other hand, we read about "Therese Carter" who claims she's "just a housewife" my mom is "just a housewife" and I would be lying if I said it didn't bother me. I know she does a lot, I have two younger sisters that she also takes care of. But, I would be lying if I said it didn't annoy me that she's constantly complaining about money yet doesn't get a job. Especially when I've worked jobs I've hated so I can pay for things. The tone of Carter's article definitely changes throughout, you can tell at first she's a little timid about saying what she does all day, like she's embarrassed. Toward the end, she seems to feel more content about what she does. I don't think that being a housewife should be frowned upon if that's really what you want to do, and you find things to keep yourself busy. Carter states, "This is my offering. I think it's the greatest satisfaction in the world to know you've pleased somebody. Everybody has to feel needed." (303).
Just some thoughts...
Were you wondering how Dannae could possibly handle her own children on top of all the crap she does all day? I think if I worked in that center every day and came home to my own kids I might kill them, I can't imagine how exhausting that would be.
Cori,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you when you say it's going to be a while before the work-home life between traditional male and female roles will be the same. I think we are making great strides, as you said, but I feel that not enough parents are like your mother, throwing you away from the traditional male and female roles, as in you playing with a baby doll rather than a monster truck. Once society sees more people like this, and raise their children in this manner, it will be much easier and acceptable for men and women to have almost the same roles.
Cori,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. It is impossible for a person to balance everything and have a "normal" functioning life. I think as long as you love what you do then that's all that matters.
I love the energy in your writing. You're always saying things you mean and including hilarious examples. You're allergic to phoning it in. Good.
ReplyDeleteI wonder, though. You write, "The disconnect is all about balance, but I don't think society will be in a place to accept men cutting back a bit on work and women spending a bit more time in their job to be able to work in their successful jobs while have a balanced home life."
Aren't we in some ways already there? Or are we just there in my dreamy-world of Athens? I don't know. It seems to me, and Slaughter points out, that men are more involved than they used to be; and of course women work a hell of a lot more outside of the home than they used to. But I'm guessing you're pointing out something subtler, as Slaughter is. As progressive as we might want to be, as modern as we think we are, there are still assumptions built in sometimes. And I like that you're honest about that.
DW